I made it! A whole year of motherhood; I’m still alive & relatively sane & well Jasper’s thriving. That makes it a successful year… right??
Was I prepared in the slightest?
No, not at all but here we are & what a crazy year its been.
Everything just went so quickly; from finding out I was pregnant, to going into early labour at 29 weeks, to having Jasper at 32 weeks to now. I really did have a short lived pregnancy & well this year has felt just as short lived.
Granted moments of it have felt like the longest months to ever exist but that’s lockdown for you. We all felt that this year; parent or not.
I think back to those newborn days & they were so calm. He was tiny & well he really shouldn’t have been out in the world so he was pretty quiet for the most part.
Yes he cried & made a fuss but mainly he was a sleepy baby.
The fourth trimester definitely was a learning experience & sometimes it was tough but if I’m totally honest with you I thought those newborn days were a little boring.
What a plonker I was cause if I could go back to those calm moments I would. Just for a moment y’no, like a mini holiday from my crazy toddler & just have a few newborn snuggles. Oh how I miss newborn snuggles!
I’ve talked a bit about the different stages of motherhood so I’m not gonna bore you with the details again but I just had to mark this milestone y’no. It’s important!
Gone is my baby & well now I have a mini fully fledged human running round my house.
I kinda think I’ve got this. Just enough not to jinx it but I do.
I think the last year taught me a lot, from how to stop & be in the moment to what kind of mum I am. I think my parent style is well developed & well the bits I’m finding tough I’m researching solutions.
I know Jasper & I am well bonded. We got our own little things & he’s learnt more about me.
Things aren’t all smooth sailing but I feel like we’ve adjusted well enough. We’ve got a routine that works for us to an extent & we’re embracing all those bumps that go along with motherhood.
I’ve just got this funny little boy who really has a fabulous personality. He’s fun & loving. He likes to play & growl at me like a monster. He’s obsessed with the washing machine & likes to steal potatoes from the cupboards. He has got a best friend in the family dog Henry but he’s still trying to persuade Bertha he’s a friend not a nuisance (I wrote this before Bertha unfortunately passed away but wanted to keep it in because she was a huge part of our little family). He’s got the cutest curls & every growing long long legs. He walks like a man who’s just downed one to many pints & he chats away non stop. He loves to use the word mama but for everything (honestly not fair!) & well he’s learning boundaries.
Honestly my brain feels overworked & pretty tired but that first year of motherhood was pretty fabulous. Those moments of growth from my tiny baby to my tiny human were just amazing. Now if he could learn to sleep in we’d be champion!
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