The Notion Of Independence || OOTD

It’s time to talk about being independent which these days it seems to be a defining feature of someone’s character. Is it really that important to be independent & are we ever fully independent anyway? Is it okay to judge someone because they aren’t completely reliant on themselves? In my mind no!! Everyone is independent at times & sometimes we just need to rely on someone else.

Back when I was struggling to find my feet & had to rely on others I would feel like utter crap. I always felt like I was failing because I had to ask for help & couldn’t fully support myself. In the end I realised I was in a never ending cycle of trying so hard & burning out whilst constantly feeling crappy towards myself no matter what I achieved. Now I’m finally in a good place I’ve realised its actually not that important.

Everybody does their own thing to gain their “independence”; it could be moving away for uni, travelling for a year or buying a car. It doesn’t even have to be an extreme thing, supporting yourself is being independent & however you wish to gain it is okay. On the other hand you can’t deem people lesser than yourself if they aren’t doing the same thing or you don’t see them as independent. You have no idea what goes on in other people’s lives nor any right to judge other people.

We all strive to be fully independent & support ourselves which isn’t a bad thing but then we ridicule  ourselves & others went we can’t commit to that ideal. Who cares!! In reality we all need help & we all co-depend so why’s that seen as such a bad thing. Reaching out for help in times of need may that just be for emotional support or you need a loan isn’t wrong. We all hit hard times so why are we so quick to judge?

I’m the first to admit I’m not completely independent; I work hard to support myself financially & that’s really important to me but in other aspects I don’t mind letting go of control. Just because I’m willing to share responsibilities with my partner doesn’t mean I lose my independence or am incapable of being independent in other ways. If that was the case the majority of us would be deemed the same.

At the end of day the notion of being fully independent is rather damaging. Yes we are independent in some aspects but nobody is truly able to completely reliant on themselves. Allowing people in isn’t wrong & nobody should be judged on how independent they are. Just know if you’re struggling & ask for help you are not weak!! Asking for help is just a strong if not stronger than muddling through by yourself.

What I’m wearing

 Jacket: New Look Top: F&F clothing Trousers: Primark (lots of variations in store)

 Converse: Vintage fair (similar) Bag: Primark

Shelley xx

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